[Vagina Miner]

Working away here in my office and listening to Radio Four (As one does) I couldn't believe my ears when halfway through a discussion re sex shops it now appears that here in Jolly England annual sales of Vibrators are now greater than annual sales of Washing Machines!!!.

I always thought that by sitting your partner on the washing machine, getting her to open her legs and then set it to maximum spin dry was one of the best sensations to behold.

So how many of you gorgeous ladies now carry a vibrator in your handbags!! or maybe you need a sainsbury's bag (There's always someone who has to have a bigger one than everybody else!! )

Vagina Miner

[ladysarahjane]

yes i have the obligatory toys but don't carry them in my handbag nor do i carry them in a sainsbury's shopping bag i keep them nicely in my bedside cabinet.

high sex drive yes...... but never felt the need to use anything whilst in the middle of the street.

ladysarahjane xxx

[tonyedwards]

What about using the toy whilst sitting 'on' the washing machine at full spin? Now that ought to be quite a sensation!!!!

[ladysarahjane]

good god tony what are you trying to do to us poor women.

personally never sat on top of the washer whilst spinning but that has something to do with the fact my washer is under the unit so don't quite get the same effect. so will have to rely on my toys

ladysarahjane xx

[Taurus]

Methinks this washing machine on full spin is a male fantasy. I've never met a woman that's actually done it!! Anyway, I've got so much junk on top of my washer that I'd never fit on!!

[Vagina Miner]

Spotted the flaw there straight away Lady Sarah.
No use using your toys in the middle of the road. (You don't want to do that!!!!)
You need to be at the SIDE of the road with one leg up on the kerb, and the higher the better (Try the kerb side outside the wonderful Chinese restaurant in St Albans!)
Makes for a much better angle of entry and consequently a much deeper penetration!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If your'e struggling just let me know and I'll come round and show you what I mean.
Now what was the order again: 2 No 4's 1 x Crispy duck and 4 Banquet meals Type B. With chopsticks or any other long objects that will slide in easily!!!

Vagina Miner

[ladysarahjane]

it must be a male fantasy taurus especially as most washer are now underneath something ie a kitchen work surface.

vagina miner you show me a oman that would enjoy something as thin as chopsticks...... come on we need to feel it's in. chopsticks just don't work or me!!! and haven't you beenm told it's bad manners to play with your food

also why would i travel to st albans to stand at the kerbside? will let you know when i'm going to stand kerbside and cause a scene which may result in a few ceashes you can then come bail me out of the local police station but please make them leave those handcuffs on

ladysarahjane xx

[tonyedwards]

Blimey what have we started here, Chinese food, chopsticks, washing machines and I always thought I was quite broadminded, seems I have a sheltered life!

Like the idea of keeping the handcuffs though, right up my street (there I go again, street, kerbs!).

Raises the question of what other items in the kitchen could be fun, chop sticks too small I agree, rolling pins, or the good old cucumber!!!!

My imagination is on overdrive now. Certainly the kitchen table has to be involved. Any other suggestions?

[ladysarahjane]

tony once again i have to be a killjoy not playing with a rolling pin .... most are made of wood (splinters .... no thank you!!!) except me being me has to be different and my rolling pin is made of marble. and as everyone knows marble is cold come to think of it so is the cucumber when it comes out of the fridge !!!!

whipped cream is fun and so is chocolate spread

ladysarahjane xxx

[tonyedwards]

At last we agree!! Chocolate spread and whipped cream get my vote and I'll be more than happy to help clean up from all those annoying nooks and crannies ( I think crannies is the word or at least something that sounds like that .

A nice wine (white) gently drizzled over can also be nice adds to the I am sure good tastes all round.

So your kitchen or mine!!! LOL

Tony xx

[Baroness Crazypaws and President McTwitch]

Try using one of those radio signal activated bullets. Chris has one, which is activated by mobile fone signals...
If you see a big smiling face in St Peters Street, St Albans then that is probaly her, with her bullet on full blast !!!!!!!!! :o